Name: Martharine Stoad nee Thripp
Age: 64
Height: 5'2"
Hair: Burnt Champagne
Style: pudding bowl.
Job: Housewife and charity shop worker.
Favourite Colour: Puce
Likes: Jam making, jigsaws, pub skittles, amigurumi and playing the ukulele.
Dislikes: Kidney beans
Favourite Film: Holiday on the Buses
Favourite Song: Chanson D'Amour by The Manhattan Transfer
Favourite painting: Wings of Love by Stephen Pearson
My children are my pride and joy, you never stop worrying about them do you? No matter how old they are. My daughter Cheryl is a great worry to me, she has made two appearances on The Undateables and on both dates they had been awkward silences, one young man during filming excused himself to go to the toilet and he never returned, filming continued and we saw Cheryl sitting alone in a cafe against a back drop of the Taj Mahal, wearing my old wedding dress and veil, it was quite moving, the other young man she met committed suicide soon after the programme aired, she's not fazed by it, in fact she's hopeful that Lydia will ring again soon to say another date has been found. Fingers crossed! My oldest, Allardyce lives in Cleveleys, he collects ornamental thimbles and mints his peas, I'll put it no stronger than that.
First Job
I worked as a waitress at a very posh hotel for £2 an hour, until I heard the cafe down the road was paying £2.10 plus tips and you get to take home yesterdays pastries, I left the hotel in a flash!
Do you have any pets?
Yes, I have a 7 year old Golden Retriever called Scarlet, she brings a lot of colour into our lives and to our living room carpet.
Have you ever been on television?
Yes, I have performed on Top of the Pops in 1971 as a member of a quartet for the band The Congregation, you can see me on Youtube I'm the one wearing the green dress, NOT her with the ugly wart on her top lip... ugh! Why the camera was focused more on her when I'm so much prettier, I'll never know.
How attractive do you think you are on a scale of 1-10?
Definitely a 9, modesty forbids a 10. I remember asking my husband Aubrey the same question on our wedding night and he said he'll like to give me one, I thought he would have rated me higher than that, but I was 9 month pregnant with my first at the time, it didn't stop him from wetting the baby's head that night either, if you know what I mean!
You are a marvel, Mitzi! And yes I did have to look up Amigurumi - my mum was also fond of doing this.
ReplyDeleteYou are so good at this!!
SXX
That hair!!! It's perfect!
ReplyDeleteThis is brilliant, Mitzi. Just what the doctor ordered to break things up a bit. And I think I love Cheryl even more now. Now, I'd better go and mint my peas...
P.S. It looks like that hotel replaced Martharine with a robot when she left.
I wonder if she over heated when he took her up the docking station.
DeleteWell, the hotel must have valued Martharine as the robot has a basin hairstyle, too!
ReplyDeleteHahaha, this whole post has just cracked me up. If life carries on like this my hair will look like this soon.
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ReplyDeleteSorry removed because of the typo.
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